Fasabrun Jamil
Some beautiful paths can't be discovered without getting lost.
What if you made a wrong decision in your life and you cannot turn it back as before?

Did you run away? Or did you go through the way?

As for me, I have no choice. I have to go through it no matter how. Well, it’s not the huge decision pun. It was about my course. The one we called, Computer Science. As a typical me, I thought that computer science revolves all the Microsoft thingy like Offices, Excel, PowerPoint etc etc, or even some editing tools.

But who knows, none of them included. The first class I entered was about C++. I already had the bad feeling about the subject. Dahla C, ade plus plus lagi. But that’s not the matter. Once my lecturer jotted down the code like, ‘cout’, ‘cin’, and asked us to pronounce them, I already failed.

The correct pronunciation was c-out, but I read it as cout (kout). And c-in as cin (kin) 😑. You see how noob I was. Yeah, no worries. I also laughed at myself for being this kind of noob. Everytime Abah picked me from Uni, I spilled out everything to him. I can’t do this. It’s too difficult for me. 

Plus I hate it to the fullest.

But Abah just ignore that 😑.

Then, I told Ma. “Ma, it’s difficult. Why on earth do I have to learn programming? I don’t like it.”
And Ma just give me the same reaction like Abah did 😑.

I told my uncles, my aunties, my brothers, my sister, my cousins, and even Aiman’s cat (this was too mainstream) but everyone was just ignoring me. K fine.

Then the 2 years and half of diploma’s fight begin. More and more programming subjects coming. Whenever I felt so difficult to learn, I called Emi. And he told me to build the interest. Interest can be built. People can fall in love at the first sight and people also can fall in love by trying to like it at first. I choose the second option. I built my interest. But I was not that positive. I still can’t like it and I failed to love it.

Emi had no choice instead of keep advising me. I knew he also being at his most patience level of comforting me, but he still be there for me. Yela, I told him about this every week and if for anyone else, that could be bored. And finally, his advice did work. He told me, “Kak Ain, just learn it as a part of amanah. This is the amanah from Allah. There were a lot of people who didn’t have the opportunity to learn and you got it. Just do your best and do it for the sake of Allah. Insya-Allah there always be the help from him.

That’s it. He got his point there. And everytime I lose my interest in programming, I kept remind myself about it. Take it as amanah. Do it for the sake of Allah.

“A fruitless year, take a fearless heart, one that blooms late will flourish in the dark” 
Criss JamiSalomé: In Every Inch In Every Mile

I graduated in Diploma Computer Science after all. And I change it to Information System Engineering when I pursue my study to bachelor degree. The one that I decide thoroughly. And I already aware of the subjects that I were going to learn and yes, it didn’t involve Microsoft thingy again.

Of course my degree was not in smooth journey as well, but my family were always there. And Emi, was being the one who kept advising me patiently. And since my degree was at Shah Alam, everyone did call me everyday. Luckily I didn’t have a boyfriend. If not I think I already break up after one day of relationship since I didn’t have a spare time for him (plus I don’t want to have a boyfriend too). My life is full with family. And it’s quite difficult to welcome a stranger.

Only a ‘stranger’ who is tough enough can be there and already be there. Eh? 🙊.

Well, not all wrong decisions are totally ‘wrong’. Sometimes Allah leads us to the wrong one before He helps us to see the right one, isn’t it? Or maybe the wrong decision that we think we are not fit in, is the best?

And as I always mention in my blog, don’t forget to be grateful with what we had and be patient.

True indeed 😉
Sesungguhnya Allah bersama-sama orang yang sabar (Al-Baqarah:153).

Fasabrun Jamil.